


Crushing Feelings

by Vidservent



Series: Musically Inspired [1]
Category: Monster Prom (Visual Novel)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, I'm Bad At Tagging, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Jealousy, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Other, Pining, Randomness, Secret Crush, Self-Doubt, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-01-09
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:01:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28647987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vidservent/pseuds/Vidservent
Summary: Brian has a crush on Oz but doesn't want to ruin their friendship so he's keeping quiet.Things get harder for the zombie when he thinks Oz has a crush they're not telling him about.3 weeks of confusion ensues.
Relationships: Blue | Vicky/Liam de Lioncourt, Calculester Hewlett-Packard & Yellow | Oz, Green | Brian & Yellow | Oz, Green | Brian/Yellow | Oz (Monster Prom), Minor or Background Relationship(s), Red | Amira/Valerie Oberlin, Yellow | Oz & Z'gord | Zoe
Series: Musically Inspired [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2159655
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	Crushing Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> I present to you the first Brian x Oz centric fanfic in english (If it's not please leave links)  
> This was supposed to be a short one-shot but being the drama queen that I am, it went out of hand. It was actually pretty tough for me to write this so I hope you like it.  
> I apologize in advance for metaphorically stabbing you then coating your wounds with sugar because that's what it felt like writing this.  
> p.s. Oz uses either He/Him and They/Them pronouns. I just made Brian think using They/Them for easier writing.

Prom was 3 weeks away and almost everyone was scrambling to find a date for the event. Brian didn’t really care much about prom or at least he normally wouldn’t have. All his friends were excited for prom, even Oz who was the shyest one in the group. That was the issue. Oz didn’t really like huge social events. So, why is Oz excited for prom? Did they have a crush Brian doesn’t know about and plans on asking them to prom?

Brian has had a crush on his best friend Oz for a long time. Of course, Oz has no idea since Brian never confessed, not wanting to ruin their friendship. He convinced himself that things were fine the way they were. The thought that Oz might like someone never crossed his mind with how anti-social they were. Now that the possibility was there Brian wasn’t sure what to do.

* * *

Throughout the first week Brian kept an eye on Oz and what he was doing to see if he’s actually trying to woo someone to go to the prom with, since Brian couldn’t bring himself to just straight out ask, fearing if the answer was yes but still curious enough to slightly stalk him from afar. Oz was hanging out a lot with Calculester and Zoe whenever he has free time and wasn’t hanging out with him or their other friends.

The bottle in his heart that sealed his feelings for Oz rattled, wanting to be released but was held back by all the terrible things that could go wrong from doing so. There’s no proof that Oz is actually going to ask anyone to prom but just the possibility makes him feel really anxious. If Oz did have a crush, the obvious thing a good friend would do is help and support them.

If… if… if… if… if…

If being with someone else makes Oz happy then there’s really nothing for him to do but accept it. They’ll still be friends regardless, nothing will really change. Isn’t that why he stayed silent? To keep things the same way. To not ruin what they already have. To crush any possibility of a rejection. The bottle shook violently at these thoughts.

* * *

It was the weekend, Brian was at a nightclub with his friends and Oz. Well, his friends have gone off somewhere unseen from where he’s standing with Oz, not doing anything in particular. The loud blaring music was obnoxious, the number of monsters in sight is nauseating and the flashing lights were dizzying.

Normally he wouldn’t really mind such scenes but he was in no mood for a night out at a nightclub. He intended to decline and stay home when Amira invited everyone in his friend group to go but when Oz said they would be going, he couldn’t say no. Someone has to be there to keep them company when the girls go wild and leaves them to fend for themselves.

Brian was about to ask why Oz even came here but before he could get any words out, Zoe appeared and gave Oz a hug along with an ear-piercing squeal that cut through the music. The sight made Brian frown for a split second, a tiny crack on the bottle in his heart. He couldn’t hear what Zoe was saying since she was speaking so fast and the music was still loud. Oz seems to just be nodding at whatever she was saying.

“Brian, wanna come with?” Zoe asked.

“WHAT?” He couldn’t really hear what Zoe said, just that his name was probably mentioned.

 _“Zoe’s asking if you want to come with us. We’re going around the club.”_ Oz explained.

The gentle friendly voice echoing in his mind clashed with all the loud chaotic sounds around him. Did Oz come because they knew Zoe would be here? If that was the case, there’s only one thing to do.

“Nah, I’ll just stay here. You two go have fun.” He said, trying to sound nonchalant.

Once those words were out of Brian’s mouth, Zoe excitedly pulled Oz away to wander off somewhere. _“Err, um, w-well I guess I’ll see you later. Zoe, you don’t have to run!”_

Brian took a seat at the counter and began ordering drinks. The only thing to do now is drown himself in alcohol until he feels numb. Being an undead zombie already made him pretty numb to most physical afflictions. Now it just hurts and he hates himself for feeling that way. He had no right to feel jealous when he’s the one that quit without even trying.

Zoe has a bright cheerful personality that’s infectious to those around her. He can see how Oz would like her, especially since the both of them are ancient entities older than time. She’s nothing like him, boring, dreary and depressing. There was nothing good about him to warrant any attraction from Oz, either in looks or personality. Hahaha, like that even matters when he’s not aiming for that attraction.

This is what he wanted, this is what he chose, this is the consequence of his inaction. Yet why? Why does he feel miserable? Why can’t he just be happy for Oz? Why did it have to be Zoe? Why can’t it be him? Why does he have these ugly feelings?

Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?

* * *

Brian doesn’t know how but he woke up in his room with a painful hangover. It took a while before he moved to get out of bed. He doesn’t remember the last time he got a hangover this bad, he must have drunk a lot. The events of last night were fuzzy, all he could remember was that he went to a nightclub with his friends.

When he got out of his room to get something to deal with his hangover, he was slightly surprised to find Oz was in his kitchen/dining room. It wasn’t the first time this happened so after a few seconds of confusion, Brian sat down at the table and took the pills Oz had prepared to deal with his hangover. They just sat there in silence for a few moments. He rests his elbows on the table, resting his head on his hands.

Brian gave Oz keys to his place long ago after a similar incident of him getting wasted happened, they kicked the door down to get in back then and replaced it afterwards, forgetting that they could have just shadow-jumped in. He found it rather endearing how Oz would forget things that should be natural to them. Oz still knocked the door whenever they came over to hang out, despite the many times he told them they could just use the key.

 _“Are you feeling better?”_ Oz asks in a soft voice.

Brian let out a grunt. “No… not yet.”

 _“Here.”_ Oz slid him a hand of bananas.

He took a banana and ate it. “I don’t think I had any bananas.”

_“You don’t, but I heard Polly once mentioned that they’re good for hangovers so I got some.”_

“Oh, thanks.” He took another banana and ate it.

Brian can’t tell if the bananas are actually working or if the pills finally kicked in. Either way, his headache is reduced by the time he finished all the bananas. Maybe he was just hungry. Now that he thinks about it, he doesn’t even know what time it is. Looking at the wall clock nearby, it was already past noon.

Brian looked back at Oz who was sitting across him. “Did you stay here all day?”

 _“More or less. I don’t really have anything to do today.”_ Oz shrugs. _“It hasn’t really been all that long through since I brought you back around 6AM.”_

The bottle in his heart rattled. These acts of selfless helpfulness always got to him. He knows full well that Oz would do the same for any of their friends but it still made him happy. Would that change if he told them how he felt? Probably, since it would be awkward.

 _“Did something happen last night?”_ Oz tilted. _“You don’t usually drink so much.”_

Brian was snapped out of his thoughts. “Uuuh… I don’t really remember much. Did I do something stupid?”

Oz shook their head. _“No, you were already passed out when I checked on you.”_

“Guess I just felt like drinking.” He said nonchalantly.

He didn’t really want to remember whatever it was if he drank enough to forget why in the first place. He might remember later but for now he’d like to say in blissful ignorance. Oz didn’t press the issue and moved on to a different topic. They spent the rest of the day at Brian’s place just hanging out. Brian reminded himself that this is all he wanted, there was no need for more, as long as they can spend time like this, nothing else matters. The bottle shakes violently.

* * *

So much for blissful ignorance, it didn’t even last for 24 hours. When Brian got to school, the posters and mentions of prom made him remember what happened at the nightclub. Obviously, his mood soured, not that it showed. Apparently, Brian wasn’t the only one in a bad mood because Damien was rushing through, punching everyone who’s minding their own business.

Brian was unlucky enough to be someone minding his own business. He was in Damien’s way and he was in no mood to get punched. For some reason Damien had the curtesy to threaten Brian before punching him which he used to reply with a snappy comeback. It somehow worked, making Damien leave without punching him. Now he can go back to brooding.

Honestly, there really was nothing to do. Whether or not Oz has someone they like, there was nothing he could do. He’ll just have to deal with his feelings on his own since it’s his problem. Usually if there was anything troubling him, he could talk about it with Oz but that’s not an option this time. Best course of action is just to ignore it completely if that’s even possible, because Oz can somehow tell when he’s seriously upset compared to just normal upset over dumb stuff, despite him acting the same either way.

At the cafeteria, he was sitting at a table with his friends and Oz before they all naturally split off. The topic of conversation was prom, of course. Brian tried to hide the distain he felt for the event since it’s basically the cause of his internal turmoil. Vicky brought up what to wear during prom which made him realize that he didn’t even know if he was even going to prom at all.

“I got this cute dress all ready for the occasion!” Vicky said excitedly. “What about you guys? Got anything ready?”

“Yeah, I got a hot suit ready.” Amira said confidently.

“I think I have a suit in my closet.” Brian said apathetically.

 _“I don’t have any suits.”_ Oz said.

“How don’t you have something ready!?” Vicky gasps at Oz.

_“I was planning on looking for something this weekend.”_

“Well, I guess that’s good.” Vicky perks up. “So, who’re you guys gonna ask to be your date to prom? I’m going to ask Liam.”

This is not what he wanted to hear right now. He’d like to just walk away and nope out of the conversation but that would obviously cause suspicion. While Oz won’t question it, Amira and Vicky won’t leave him alone until they get an answer out of him and they can be highly annoying when that happens.

“I’m going to ask Valerie.” Amira said.

“Oh, so that’s why you’ve been going to the shop a lot.” Vicky glanced over to where the shopkeeper usually sits. “What about you two?”

 _“I’m just going to prom. I didn’t think of a date.”_ Oz said matter-of-factly.

“Same.” Brian said immediately after.

Hearing that Oz didn’t even think of a date to bring, made him feel relieved and stupid. He was worrying about nothing after all. N-not that it really matters because Oz is free to do what they want.

“Aw, c’mon! It’s prom! You guys should look for a date!” Vicky pouted.

_“It’s not mandatory and I’d rather not stress myself over it.”_

“I guess that’s true.” Vicky reluctantly agrees to logic. “What about you Brian? What’s your excuse?”

“Just no one in mind.” Hell, he didn’t even know he was even going until just now.

“Alright, so you two are going stag.” Amira stated. “BUT! Hypothetically, if you HAD to bring a date, who would you ask?”

“Ooooh yeah! Who!?” Vicky grinned.

Brian felt like pelting his lunch tray to their faces. But alas he only has one and that would be an overreaction. Oz seems to be deep in thought actually thinking of an answer. Okay, maybe it’s not such a bad thing, this is just a hypothetical question after all and he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t slightly curious.

A whole minute passed in anticipated silence. “Okay, it’s clear that Oz will take forever to answer but what about you Brian?” Amira turned to Brian.

“Zoe?” He blurted without thinking since he thought that’s what Oz was going to say.

Shit. Now they’re gonna think he kind of likes Zoe or at least attracted to her in some way. If Oz actually likes Zoe, things are going to be really awkward or worse they’ll feel betrayed. Glancing over to Oz, it doesn’t look like their expression changed at all. He’s got to defuse whatever assumptions could sprout from this.

“Don’t think too much on it. It’s just hypothetical.” He deadpans.

“Oh, so you’re just dropping out random names?” Amira raised a brow.

“No possible rejection and it’s not like I’m going to actually ask them to prom.” He shrugs.

“You’re no fun.” Vicky whines then turns to Oz. “Have you thought of someone yet?”

 _“Hmmm… if I had to get a date for prom… I guess… I’d ask Calculuster.”_ Oz nodded to themselves.

The answer made Brian somewhat confused. He somehow convinced himself that Oz liked Zoe but did they actually like Cal? Perhaps he should just stop thinking about it. All the thinking has been too much to handle. His earlier slip-up made him realize that as long as Oz is happy then that’s all that matters.

Amira and Vicky went off to other tables once their prospect prom dates showed up, leaving Brian alone with Oz at their table. Calculuster and Zoe joined their table when they arrived, they seem to be looking for Oz to resolve some sort of dispute. Feeling like a fourth wheel on a table where 3 of the table occupants didn’t need food, Brian moved to eat with Coach. He didn’t really mind those two but with how he is now, Oz would definitely find out he’s acting weird.

Realizing that he’s been a bit obsessive and the fact that following your friend around school without them knowing is not healthy behavior, he didn’t do that again this week. He needed to relax from all the stress he caused himself so he hung out with Kale whenever they were chilling to smoke weed. He would still see Oz around with Calculester or Zoe but the sight didn’t make him anxious anymore.

The week passed by pretty uneventful or at least as uneventful days at Spooky High could be. It was Friday and Brian just finished with PE. Damien was screaming at something, how that guy gets angry at nothing makes Brian exhausted just thinking about it. Looks like Damien was screaming at a banana, having heard enough nonsense and slightly hungry, Brian ate the banana.

Apparently, that was a bad move that painted a target on Brian’s back for a prom fight with Damien… how the hell was he supposed to know that eating a banana would cause that!? Well, Damien has a pretty short attention span. If Brian is lucky enough, Damien would forget about it by the time next week rolls around.

* * *

Brian wasn’t so lucky. News of his fight with Damien on prom night has spread throughout the school and even has pamphlets made for it. Looks like he won’t be able to escape this fight when everyone knows about it. He heard the last student that tried to flee a scheduled fight with Damien ended up at a chicken farm, not really sure about the details though. Being sent to a chicken farm sounds worse than possibly losing somehow.

It’s not like he was actually looking forward to prom so this might as well be a good alternative to let off some steam and beat the shit out of that bratty prince of hell. Not that he’s sure he’ll actually win, but it’s always best to go in with a positive mindset when it comes to matches. Now that he’s thought about it, he hasn’t really been in a brawl before.

Oz came looking for Brian as soon as they heard the news, they were panicking more than he was about the whole ordeal. He jokingly told Oz that he’s already practically dead so he’s not in any real danger, it doesn’t seem to calm the fear monster down. Before he could seriously reassure Oz that it’s not a big deal, Vera and Scott came rushing through to Brian to discuss situation, apparently.

They mentioned things about beating Damien up and monetizing from the situation. Vera heard from Polly that Damien was giving away free tickets to watch him skin Brian alive, that bit of news sounded ludicrous but not surprising coming from Damien. Brian figured he’d ask for Scott’s help to train him in preparation for the fight which he agreed to and Vera is still planning to profit out of all of this.

Just before he headed off to start his training with Scott, Brian looked back at Oz that has been silent throughout the whole conversation. They looked less distress now, normal even as they wished him luck on his training with a cheerful voice, then went off somewhere, probably to class. He has no idea what calmed Oz down but at least they’re not worried anymore.

Brian spent the whole week training with Scott and Vera. Well, training with Scott, Vera was more of a manager. He didn’t see Oz again during that time which wasn’t surprising since he’s skipping classes to train. Instead, he’d receive the occasional text from Oz, asking how he’s doing. Those texts gave him a fuzzy warm feeling. While he doesn’t like worrying Oz, it’s nice to know they really care about his well-being, even though he’s an undead zombie.

During a lunch breaks, Brian couldn’t see Oz at the cafeteria. They don’t really need to go to the cafeteria to eat but it was odd that they weren’t there all week. When he asked why through text, Oz just said they weren’t in the mood to go there. He went to ask his friends if they’ve seen Oz anywhere, Vicky only saw them a few times in class.

Brian happened to bump into Calculester during the last day of school before prom. Considering Oz has been hanging out with him more lately, Brian asked if he’s seen Oz.

[:D] “No, I have not seen Friend Oz today.”

“Oh, when was the last time you saw him?”

[:I] “Two days ago. Friend Oz has been in a temperamental state so he’s avoiding unnecessary social contact or so he said when I pointed out his odd behavior.”

Brian raised a brow. “Odd behavior?”

[:/] “Yes. He was acting rather irrational compared to his usual rational self.”

That could really mean anything. “Ummm… what happened exactly?”

[D:] “During Monday’s lunchtime, Friend Oz punched Vendronica without provocation.” [:/] “It was very confusing but he apologized to Vendronica afterwards.”

That certainly doesn’t sound like Oz, they’d never randomly punch anyone without provocation, even with. “Who’s Vendronica?”

[:D] “She’s the vending machine in the cafeteria.”

Okay, that makes more sense, still doesn’t really sound like something Oz would do. “Did you find out why he punched the vend… Vendronica?”

[:I] “Not really, no. He said: I saw an insufferable wretch within sight. It didn’t make sense and he didn’t elaborate like he usually does.” [:0] “Do you know what that means Friend Brian?”

“Uhhh… sounds like he just saw someone annoying.” Which is still weird.

It was rare for Oz to get angry at anything, let alone angry at an individual so much that the sight of them made Oz punch a vending machine on reflex. Is something wrong going on with Oz? They seem pretty normal through text… right, they always seem normal through text. Oz did say they weren’t in the mood to go to the cafeteria, are they avoiding someone? Everyone goes to the cafeteria during lunch so that doesn’t narrow down anything.

Brian wanted to ask Oz what was wrong but if they haven’t told him anything, then they probably don’t want him knowing. Even Amira and Vicky didn’t sound like they know anything weird going on with Oz. Good thing is, it doesn’t seem like Oz is having an existential crisis. Bad thing is, Oz isn’t telling anyone what’s bothering them. Well, it’s not really bad but just disheartening.

Calculester said that vending machine thing happened on Monday, which means that they’ve been having some sort of issue all week and Brian didn’t even notice it until now. He was so busy doing his own thing that he couldn’t even tell that Oz was acting weird. Granted they haven’t seen each other the whole week but still… ugh, he’s definitely going to beat the shit out of Damien tomorrow night or else all that training would be for naught.

* * *

It was finally prom night. Brian didn’t bother with a suit since he’s just going to have a fight. He met his friends near the entrance where prom was being held, they looked good in their dress and suit. They wished him luck before going in to meet up with their dates. He didn’t see Oz anywhere, it was weird since they seemed to be the one most concerned about the fight before it even happened.

Brian headed towards the back of the building where a fight ring was made, mostly arranged by Vera to make it a spectacle. There were already students gathered there to watch the fight. He was surprised to see Oz there talking with Scott and Vera. They were wearing their usual casual clothes, not at all looking like someone who’s going to prom despite the excitement they showed for it 3 weeks ago. Taking a better look at everyone around, nobody is dressed for prom. He approached the odd trio since they were standing at his corner of the ring.

“Bro, you’re finally here!” Scott said excitedly. “Go show that demon who’s boss!”

Oz turned around and looked at Brian. “Um, uh, hey Oz. Didn’t think you’d be here.” Knowing that Oz had been secretly moody the past week made him feel nervous seeing them now.

 _“I was obviously going to be here.”_ Oz chuckled. _“Why else would I keep checking on how you were doing if I wasn’t going to come?”_

The bottle in his heart shook violently hearing those sweet lighthearted words. “But what about prom?”

 _“This is technically a part of prom.”_ Oz pulls out a pamphlet. _“It’s officially scheduled in the prom prom-gramme. I think Vera pulled some strings.”_

Oh, right. He can vaguely remember Vera mentioning something like that. Something about making a betting pool and if he loses there’s a fate worse than death awaiting him, not that he needed any extra incentive to win.

 _“Anyway, good luck out there. I’ll be cheering for you so give that insolent hellspawn a beating!”_ Oz said cheerfully as they smiled with their eyes. Some phobias popped up on their shoulders who also look like they’re cheering.

“Yeah, sure…” How can they make insults sound so elegant and cute?

“Alright, that’s enough chit-chat.” Vera said. “Brian, go get ready and Oz, you know what to do.” She commanded before walking away.

Brian turned to Oz with a quizzical look. “What did I miss?”

_“I’ve been recruited to keep a tally for the bets.”_

“How did that happen?”

 _“I recklessly offered some assistance.”_ Oz sighed. _“Well, I better get to it.”_ They waved as they started to walk away.

“Hey, Oz?” Oz stopped to look back at Brian. “Did… no, nevermind. It’s nothing.”

Oz tilted. _“Okay?”_ They continued to walk away into the crowd.

It doesn’t seem like Oz is troubled by anything now. Even if he did ask, would Oz actually tell him what was troubling them? If they lie and said there was nothing wrong, would that mean they didn’t trust him enough to tell him? Not that he’s any better. Perhaps he should just focus on the task at hand.

The fight was intense. Punches and blows were exchanged. All the training and advice is proving useful but Damien is no spring chicken, unlike the students sent to the chicken farm. Brian let all of the anger and frustration out with each attack he landed. He knew deep down that violence is never the answer but all this violence was giving him cathartic release more than the training he did.

Damien looked like he was enjoying himself for some reason. They were pretty evenly matched somehow. After some time had passed since the fight began, Damien suddenly grabbed Brian’s head with both his hands, a move he didn’t do until now. Brian braced himself for a headbutt or even knee kick but what happened was neither of those things, he felt something on his lips.

A second of confusion passed before he realized what was happening. Damien was kissing him. He felt something crack inside him and gave a powerful right hook to the unsuspecting demon. Apparently, that punch was strong enough to knock Damien out, making Brian the winner of this fight but he didn’t care anymore. He covered his mouth with a hand and ran away to the nearest bathroom. He thought he heard someone call his name but he didn’t stop running.

When he got to the bathroom, he washed his face and tried to process what just happened. Why the fuck did Damien kiss him? That was… his first kiss, at least it was the first as far as he can remember in his zombie life. He knew it shouldn’t be a big deal, he wasn’t expecting anything magical or anything but he thought he’s at least have it with someone he liked.

Brian was hunched over the sink when he heard the bathroom door open, he glanced at the entrance and saw Oz there.

 _“Brian! Are you okay!?”_ Oz rushed over to Brian’s side and placed a hand on his shoulder. _“You look pale.”_ They gently turned him to face them. _“D-did you actually get hurt? A-are all your bones in the right place? D-do you feel sick?”_ They sounded concerned as they try to look for anything physically wrong with him.

Hearing their concerned voice, the bottle in his heart holding everything back shattered. Nothing made sense anymore. All reason was lost. “Oz.” He said in a low voice.

 _“Yes?”_ Oz looked up to Brian.

He closed his eyes and leaned down, planting a kiss on Oz’s mouthless face. After a few seconds, he pulled back. “I like you.” He said softly.

When he opened his eyes to look down at Oz, they looked bewildered with their white eyes rounded like saucers. The sight snapped him out of his daze, realization dawned on him. What he just did. Embarrassment and dread washed over him. He wanted a hole to swallow him up and never leave. The only thing he could do was flee the scene, so he did. Leaving a baffled Oz behind, not wanting to know how they’ll react once they’re done being stunned.

As he ran home, his vision began to blur but it wasn’t bad enough that he couldn’t see. Once in the comforts of his apartment he slid down on the door behind him and sat on the floor. He finally noticed why his vision was blurry, he was crying. Tears ran down his face as the sorrow he felt seeped in deeper, digging at his soul. He ruined everything. The one thing he wanted to keep, he wanted to protect, he destroyed it and there’s no going back.

* * *

Brian spent the rest of the weekend locked up in his room, curled up in his bed. He kept thinking of how badly he messed up. Not only did he tell Oz how he felt, he did it at the worst possible timing, taking advantage of Oz’s kindness. While he felt like a weight was lifted off his chest, it was replaced by a heavy sense of guilt. How did it come to this? If only he was content with what he had, none of this would have happened.

It was Monday, he skipped school. His phone vibrated a few times but he didn’t check. He could hear his front door being knocked but didn’t move. Soon he could hear the door opening. Shit, there were only 3 people that could enter aside from Brian: The landlord, Oz and a burglar. The landlord never visits, it’s unlikely that a burglar would knock, so that only leaves Oz. Oz was here. Brian sat up and stared at his door nervously.

The door to his locked room rattled, then there was a knock. _“Brian? Are you awake?”_

Yes, but he didn’t want to face Oz right now. Why were they even here? In hindsight, maybe he should have expected this. “Just go away! I want to be left alone!” He shouted at the door. His voice sounded hoarser than he expected, he hasn’t drunk anything in a while.

It was silent for a moment, then dark inky matter slid in from under the door, materializing Oz inside. Brian flinched at the sight, wondering what’s going to happen next. Are they mad? Do they hate him? Are they going to cut ties with him? Many negative scenarios popped up in his mind. Oz didn’t say anything, walked towards his door, unlocked it and went out. They came back soon with a glass of water in hand.

Oz sat at the edge of Brian’s bed and handed him the glass of water without a word. Not knowing what else to do, he gingerly took the glass and drank the water. Well, that takes care of his parched throat, but what now? Oz wasn’t saying anything and Brian couldn’t look them in the eyes so he just looked down. Now they were just sitting there on his bed in silence while he held an empty glass in his hands. It was… very awkward.

It reminds him of the times he wasn’t used to Oz’s silent approach. They’d stay silent and just wait until he spoke up. Did it always feel this nerve-wrecking? Normally, it felt like time had stopped and the spell was broken when he finally spoke. Now it felt like daggers were stabbing into him and he wants it to stop but can’t say a word. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, no words came out.

 _“To be honest, I’m very confused right now.”_ Oz was the one to break the silence. _“I don’t know why you’re like this but I can’t help if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.”_

Oz didn’t sound mad, just concerned like they always are, like nothing even happened. Did they forget what happened that night? Was it all just a dream? No, that can’t be right. The only thing that makes sense is that it meant nothing to them, that’s why they’re acting normal. The thought frustrated him.

“Why?” He whispered.

 _“Why, what?”_ Oz sounded confused.

“Why can’t you just leave me alone!?” He yelled as he gripped tightly on to the empty glass. “Why do you always meddle!? I don’t remember asking for your help yet you always do! I tell you all my problems and you actually listen to me! I do something dumb and make you worry but you never complain about it! Just WHY!?” He felt like crying again. “If only you didn’t do that then I…” Wouldn’t have fallen for you. The words were stuck in his throat.

What Oz was doing to him now was killing him with kindness. He used to think it was a silly phrase but now he knew just how much kindness can hurt and it’s suffocating him. It would’ve been easier if Oz was actually mad at him or even outright rejected him. But acting like nothing happened, doesn’t that just mean they didn’t care about him? At least not in the way he wants them to. He can’t lie to himself anymore, just being friends was not enough, he wanted more than that.

Oz’s hand appeared in his sight, taking the glass he was gripping. He hadn’t realized that it was starting to crack. Brian hasn’t looked up once to see how Oz was reacting. It just dawned on him that his outburst might have just confused Oz more than they already were.

Suddenly, his face was turned towards Oz. They had placed their left hand on the right side of his face which was lacking flesh. He’d always been a bit self-conscious about that part of his face so the sudden contact made him stiffen.

 _“I do all those things because I care about you and you’re important to me. I’m not sure why you’re mad about that but I’ll try to be less meddlesome if it bothers you so much.”_ Oz said in a gentle voice. _“And… u-ummm… I…”_ They looked down breaking eye contact. _“I l-like you too s-so I don’t want to upset you.”_ They stuttered out the words.

Brian’s eyes widen. “What?” He feels like he’s hearing things.

Oz looked back at Brian and retracted his hand that was on his face. _“I like you too?”_

Recovering from the initial shock, it’s not really the first time Oz said they liked him, in a friend capacity of course. They probably mistook what he said that night as that kind of like. He feels like he should clarify that, even though he knows there’s no way Oz would reciprocate his feelings.

Brian let out a sigh. “Oz, I don’t like you as a friend. I meant that I like-like you, like romantically.”

Oz’s brows furrowed the way they do when they’re annoyed or mad. It’s hard to tell when they lacked a lot of facial features.

 _“Brian.”_ Oz said rather sternly. _“I’d have to be blind and numb to misunderstand what **like** you meant.”_ They pointed at their face. _“You kissed my face right before you said it.”_

Brian blushed at the mention of his rash action bluntly pointed out. “T-that…” He took a breath to compose himself. “If you know that then why did you say you like me too?”

_“Because I do.”_

“You don’t have to say it just to spare my feelings.”

_“I’m not.”_

“You are.”

There’s no way that’s true. Oz is too nice so they’re just saying that for his sake, even though they don’t feel the same way. He didn’t want to get his hopes up just for them to crash down later.

_“I’m very confused. Are you saying you don’t want me to like you?”_

“No.”

_“Then are you saying you don’t actually like me that way?”_

“No.”

_“I like you too.”_

“No, you don’t.”

_“I’m not lying.”_

“You are.”

_“Do you want me to reject you?”_

“…………. No.”

Oz smacked their own forehead then ran their hand down their face, stopping where their mouth should be if they had one. Brian knew he was being unreasonable, it’s a wonder why Oz is still putting up with him.

Oz grabbed Brian by the collar pulling him close, their eyes still look annoyed. _“Close your eyes.”_ They said curtly.

Not knowing what’s going to happen, Brian shut his eyes tightly. Nothing happened for a while but then he could feel something soft pressing his lips. The sensation made him peek to see what’s going on and he saw Oz in front of him. It took a few seconds for him to register that Oz was kissing him with lips and then Oz pulled away. They actually had a mouth but it disappeared as soon as Brian could see it.

Oz looked flushed. _“I like you, you idiot and don’t you dare say I’m lying again or I swear I’ll slap you!”_

Brian couldn’t really say anything, he’s too stunned processing what just happened. Oz likes him? Like actually likes him? It seems too good to be true. Is this a dream? Has he been dreaming this whole time? If it was a dream, he doesn’t want to wake up. He can say anything if this was a dream.

“Will you go out with me?”

_“Sure.”_

Yep, this has got to be a dream. A wonderful lucid dream where he can feel sensations just as if he were awake. A goofy grin was plastered on his face.

 _“Ummm… if you’re feeling better you should probably eat something.”_ Oz looked at the cracked glass on Brian’s bedside table. _“And maybe drink more liquid.”_

“Oh, right.”

Not that it matters since this is a dream albeit a fairly realistic dream. It would be nice to eat something but he doesn’t want to cook. He could order takeout but they’re overpriced for one person to order and Oz doesn’t need to eat. Plus, money is a bit tight this month. It might be a dream but he’s not paying overpriced stuff even in a dream.

Brian turned to Oz. “Can you make me something?”

 _“Y-you want me to cook?”_ Oz pointed at themselves. _“You know I don’t really eat organic food.”_

“Yeah, but I always wondered what your cooking would taste like.” He smiled.

_“Well… I guess I can try to cook something but don’t blame me if it turns out bad.”_

“Don’t worry, I’ll finish off anything you make.”

A blush appeared on Oz’s face. _“O-oh, um, I-I’ll be borrowing your kitchen.”_ They stormed out of his room.

Wow, he didn’t think Oz could be more adorable than they already were. He really did wonder what food made by Oz would taste like. It’s not like Oz never ate any normal food, they just rarely do. The mouth Oz uses when eating is wide and monstrous unlike the normal looking mouth Brian saw earlier after they kissed him… Brian tossed around a bit in his bed before getting up and finally leaving his room.

When he went into the kitchen, Oz was at the stove cooking something. He took out a carton of milk from the fridge and sat at the table. Watching Oz cook was pretty interesting. He half-expected them to be fumbling around not really knowing how to cook. It’s probably because this is a dream. Maybe he could ask Oz if they know how to cook when he wakes up. Hmmm… he can actually taste the milk.

After Oz was finished cooking, they placed a plate of what looks like a thick omelette in front of Brian. It hasn’t even been an hour since they started but egg dishes are pretty fast to make. As Brian stared at the omelette curiously, Oz was sitting across him as usual. Breaking the omelette with a spoon, it turns out to be a rice omelette.

Brian took a bite and was surprised on how flavorful it tasted. It wasn’t too much or too light but just the right amount of seasoning. The omelette was perfectly yellow without any burnt parts, the rice wasn’t overcooked, there were chunks of brain and sliced fried eggs in there too. There’s no way this is the first time Oz cooked this, especially with how fast they made it. Oh, right, this is a dream.

“Is this the first time you cooked?” Still wouldn’t hurt to ask.

 _“Y-you don’t have to force yourself to eat it if it tastes that bad!”_ Oz leaned forward and was about to take the plate away but Brian pulled it out of reach.

“Calm down, that’s not what I meant. This is really good which is why I’m asking.”

Oz stopped trying to take the plate away and sat back down. _“Oh, t-thanks?”_ They looked down and twiddled their thumbs. _“It’s not really the first time. I’ve practiced a bit.”_

“Really? How come you never told me? You know I’m a foodie.”

 _“T-that’s why. I didn’t really plan on telling you until I was sure I can make something good enough.”_ Oz said sheepishly. _“I’m glad you like it.”_ They smiled with their eyes.

If he had a beating heart it would have skipped a beat. “Has anyone else tried your cooking?”

Oz was their hand in front of their face. _“Gosh no. I just let my phobias be the taste testers, they’d eat anything really so I had to try some myself just to be sure.”_ Some phobias popped up shrugging and giving thumbs up.

They both chat as Brian ate, he found himself eating slower than he normally does, wanting to savor the taste. Oz told him that they got curious about cooking after watching a bit too many food related anime. He did recall that Oz started following him whenever he was trying out new restaurants after watching an anime about a restaurant in another world. Damn, this dream sure is meticulous.

Brian finished eating and checked on the time, it was very late at night. Since it’s a weekday Oz would be leaving soon but he didn’t really want to end things now. He’d like to prolong this dream as much as possible.

“Wanna stay the night?”

Oz’s eyes shifted from the clock to Brian but then it started to shift around more the way it does when they’re contemplating something. Are they against the idea? Guess he can’t really control everything in this dream. After a few moments they seem to have reached a conclusion.

_“Sure, I’ll stay over but…”_

Oh, they said yes. “But?”

_“Would you mind if we sleep together?”_

“Se, se, se, sle…” Brian stuttered. What the hell is going on!? This went from 0 to 100 real fast! He’s not mentally prepared for that, dream or not when he’s perfectly conscious! Why would Oz even say that? Is he secretly so horny for Oz and this is his subconscious speaking?

_“Brian? I-it’s okay if you don’t want to. I know it’s a weird request.”_

“I-it’s not weird but… aren’t you moving too fast?”

Oz tilted. _“Moving too fast?”_ They looked confused for a while, then their face flushed. _“T-that’s… that’s not what I meant! I meant it literally! Just sleep together.”_ They covered their face with their hands. _“Um, yeah, okay, now I hear it.”_ They whined.

Brian tried to calm down from his flustered state. Yeah, okay, while still pretty bold, that wasn’t really something he’d be against. He’d love to just sleep together with Oz but then he remembered something.

“Didn’t you say you don’t need sleep?” Brian raised a brow. “Are you just going lie down with me?”

_“Well, I don’t need sleep but it doesn’t mean I can’t.”_

Welp, good enough! Although he wonders if that’s also true for the real Oz. Being a tidy monster, Oz went to wash the dishes, including the ones Brian had left to pile up in the sink. When they went back to Brian’s room, they both stared at his single bed, it seems like they both forgot about that.

 _“I-it was a stupid idea anyway. I’ll just go to the living room.”_ Oz was about to leave but Brian grabbed their shoulder.

“It’s fine.” His bed isn’t so small it can’t fit the two of them and Oz is pretty slender.

_“B-but it’s only mea-.”_

Before Oz could finish their sentence, Brian pulled them onto the bed. Since there wasn’t much room, they were pressed up together. He cradled Oz’s head to lean on his shoulder instead of the pillow. They were in a shingles sleeping position.

“See? There’s enough room.” He smirked as he looked at a dazed Oz.

 _“I g-guess so.”_ Oz shifted a bit.

Silence washed over them but this time it was a comfortable silence. He’s probably going to wake up once he sleeps or at least that’s how he thinks these lucid dreams worked. Weird that you need to sleep to wake up.

_“Brian?”_

“Yeah?”

_“Ummm… it’s okay if you don’t want to tell me but… what happened back then when you kissed me?”_

The question made him stiffen, remembering things that happen back then weren’t pleasant. “Why do you want to know?” He said in a low gruff voice.

_“Well, like I said earlier. I’m very confused. I don’t even know why you skipped school and ignored all my texts today.”_

Brian pondered on whether or not to answer Oz’s question. It’ll probably be good to get things off his chest and make the dream last longer while he’s at it. So, Brian told Oz what he’s been going through since prom night. Just like the real Oz, dream Oz silently listened to him as he tried to put his feelings into words. When he was done, Oz didn’t say anything, they just hugged him and he felt elated. He returned the hug, embracing Oz tightly.

He felt fatigue and drowsy after everything, starting to fall asleep but he could feel Oz fidgeting constantly for some reason.

“What’s wrong?”

_“I-is it common to get nightmares?”_

“Uh, what?”

 _“Since I’m an embodiment of fear I thought that maybe I’ll have a nightmare when I fall asleep.”_ Oz said nervously.

“Didn’t you say you can sleep?” He said drowsily.

_“I can b-but I never actually tried before.”_

“Then why did you suggest this?” This was extremely confusing and his brain is barely awake to think.

_“T-there’s a first time for everything and you always look so relaxed when sleeping. Now I’m not so sure this was a good idea. D-don’t mind me, I’ll just stay still now.”_

He’s not sure if that actually answers his question but basically Oz is nervous that they’ll have a nightmare to actually sleep. Brian cradled Oz’s head up and planted a kiss on their forehead.

“It’ll be fine. If you do get a nightmare, I’ll be right here, okay?”

_“O-okay.”_

With that dealt with, he fell asleep. The last thing he felt was Oz snuggling up to him. They both slept in the sweetheart cradle position.

* * *

It was Tuesday morning when Brian woke up. The way he usually wakes up is by him staring at the ceiling for a few minutes before actually moving. He could still clearly remember the dream he had last night, it brought a smile to his face but he was back in reality now. Just as he was about to get up, he realized the weight on him. When he looked down, he could see Oz sleeping on his shoulder as their arms are wrapped around his waist.

Brian went into an internal panic not wanting to move and wake Oz. WTF!? WTF!? WTF!? Does this mean everything that happened last night was real!? Is he still dreaming!? No, he’s certain this is reality now unless he’s caught up in some sort of Inception plot. Brian spent the next hour internally screaming, recalling everything that happened last night as Oz was blissfully sleeping on him.

He had said and done some pretty bold stuff because he thought it was all a dream. Now that he knows it actually happened, all the embarrassment came washing over him like a tidal wave. If he had a beating heart, it would be pounding so hard that the noise could probably wake Oz up.

Once he calmed down, he just stared at Oz. He’s never seen Oz sleep and they never did. It all felt so surreal. Thinking on it now, they did say this was their first time sleeping… THEIR FIRST!? If only he could move now, he’d be tossing about not sure what to do, actually he’d be doing that for the past hour if he could.

Oz’s eyes blinked then they turned up to look at Brian. _“Morning.”_

“M-morning.”

Oz got up, moving away from Brian. He’s glad he didn’t wake up Oz right away but he was really stiff from trying not to move for so long, he also sat up and moved his joints around. Oz sat at the edge of the bed.

“So, how was sleeping?”

 _“Hmmm…”_ Oz checked their watch. _“I feel like time skipped while nothing happened.”_

“Uh, I guess that’s one way to put it.”

_“I don’t think I like it.”_

“Well, it’s not like you need it so that’s fine.” It’s a shame, though.

Oz turned to Brian. _“I wouldn’t really mind doing it occasionally if we’re sleeping together.”_ They smiled with their eyes.

Brian knows what Oz meant this time but it still sounded like an innuendo and in a way, just as embarrassing, making him blush. Oz went and made breakfast, even though Brian told them they didn’t have to but they insisted. Brian checked his phone which he had ignored for days as he was waiting. It was mostly just texts from Oz aside from some of his friends congratulating him on the prom fight win.

All of Oz’s texts were either concerned ones asking how he’s doing or confused ones asking what happened, ending with one that says they’re coming over. Reading them made him feel bad for all the worry and confusion he caused them. It does remind him that Oz was acting weird last week according to Calculester.

Brian brought up the topic as he ate the pancakes Oz made, they were yummy. He wasn’t sure Oz was going to answer but after being quiet for a moment since he asked the question, they let out a big sigh and looked annoyed. Oz didn’t really go into details but apparently, they had an intense “disagreement” with a certain “obnoxious man-child of a demon” that made them very irritable throughout the week.

Oz began to rant about Damien, never really mentioning him by name and changing the string of insulting names each time, as if just mentioning his actual name might trigger them. Brian’s never seen Oz this worked up about an actual person before, it was a rare sight. He wonders what sort of disagreement did they have to finally pass Oz’s boiling point when all the times they’ve complained about Damien before were delivered in mild annoyance. It’s probably best not to ask with how mad they look just talking about the demon in general now.

Since Oz is being pretty open now, there was something else he’s been curious about. Everything is slowly starting to sink in but it still doesn’t feel real. That one thing still doesn’t make sense to him.

“Oz, um, you like me, right?”

 _“Yes, I’m pretty sure we’ve made that clear.”_ Oz folded their arms. _“I hope you’re not going back into denial.”_ They sound annoyed. Either because of all the ranting or exasperated from the last time they had this discussion.

“No, I get that. It’s just…” Brian took a deep breath. “How come last week you said you’d ask Cal to prom if you had to choose a date?”

Unlike himself that blurted out his answer without thinking for that hypothetical question, Oz actually thought seriously for an answer just like they always do. Could it be that they also like Calculester? Or is Brian just a rebound? He’s not sure how to feel about that if it’s the case.

_“Oh that? It was just a mutually beneficial arrangement that made him the most logical candidate to ask.”_

“Mutually beneficial?” It sounded like they were talking about a political marriage but for prom.

_“I guess you could say it’ll be more of a social experiment rather than being an actual date. You know how he likes to learn about life and organics. I’m pretty sure he’d say yes if I asked him to prom with the goal of observation and experience or at least I think so.”_

“You didn’t think to ask someone you like?”

_“Well… you were already going with Zoe and no one else came to mind so I chose the logical answer.”_

“You were going to ask me?”

_“Hypothetically, I contemplated on you as an option so I guess, maybe? I wasn’t finished contemplating when you said you’d ask Zoe so I never reached conclusion on if I would ask you or not considering you’d be going to prom regardless in this hypothetical scenario.”_

Damn, he should’ve kept his mouth shut back then. “You still could’ve picked me.” He grumbled.

 _“I could say the same thing to you.”_ Yeah, can’t really argue with that. _“Speaking of Zoe…”_

Oh no, does Oz think he likes Zoe!? “What about Zoe?” He tried to sound casual.

Oz pulled out their phone. _“Do you mind if I tell her that we’re dating now?”_

*chocking noises* “WE’RE DATING!?”

Oz narrowed their eyes. _“Yes. You’re the one that asked me out silly, or did you forget?”_

Thinking on it, that did happen. It just went so smoothly he forgot about it… somehow. He hasn’t really thought if they should keep a relationship secret or not since it was never a possibility he considered. It’s nice to know that Oz doesn’t mind others knowing about their relationship but it’s weird that they’re specifically mentioning it to Zoe. He can’t really think of a reason to say no since it’s so sudden but might as well let Oz do what they want.

“Oh, right.” He took a sip of water to clear his throat. “That’s fine but why are you telling Zoe?”

Oz started typing on their phone. _“The sooner the better or else she’ll harass me for not telling her if it’s too late.”_

“Uh… is it that bad?” He knows she can be pretty intense but that doesn’t seem like a reason to tell her right this instant.

 _“Not really but I still need to do some damage control before all hell breaks loose.”_ Oz is typing more intensely than before.

“Damage control?”

 _“No time to explain.”_ Oz quickly stood up. _“I have to go now. I’ll see you later at school.”_ They rushed out of the room. After a few seconds they came back and pressed their face against Brian’s right cheek. _“Or not if you don’t feel like going today. Just answer my texts this time, okay?”_ They rushed out again.

Brian was left dumbfounded.

* * *

Recovering from what felt like a passing tornado, Brian decided to go to school. He has no idea why Oz left in such a hurry, aside that it has something to do with Zoe. It’s not like they need to share everything just because they’re dating… apparently, but the mention of damage control and hell breaking loose sounded pretty ominous. Hopefully Oz meant the latter part metaphorically since Zoe could destroy the fabric of reality if she wanted to.

Vera poisoned him before he could even go to first period just to give him his cut from the prom fight winnings. He wished she had a less life-threatening way to schedule meetings, at least he got some money. Maybe he can use it to buy something for Oz. He’s been constantly causing them to worry lately and despite having issues of their own, they still spared their time to deal with him.

During lunch he met up with his friends at the cafeteria, nothing was out of the ordinary. Oz was nowhere in sight, probably still not in the mood. The sound of familiar yelling made him turn to see Damien was at a table with Zoe who looks excited while he looks pissed off as usual. Brian had mostly forgotten about his fight with Damien on prom night and he’d prefer to keep it that way.

 **Brian:** Where are you?

 **Oz:** Library.

 **Brian:** Can I join you?

 **Oz:** Do you even need to ask? You usually just come over.

 **Brian:** I don’t want to bother you

 **Oz:** You’re not. Unless you’re secretly a certain psychotic pyromaniac using my boyfriend’s phone, you know what’ll happen to you if that’s the case.

The word ‘boyfriend’ stood out for him, the rest of the text was practically unread. He’s still a bit skeptical on how real everything is. So, they really are dating now. He’d have a harder time believing it if Oz wasn’t so bold about that… fact. Preferring to spend lunch with Oz, he excused himself to leave the cafeteria.

As he was on his way to the library, he found himself being chased by angry prince of hell somehow. Once Brian reached an empty area, he stopped running since he didn’t even know why Damien was chasing him. Turns out that Damien wanted to apologize to him, begrudgingly as it looked like saying sorry was physically hurting him. Brian has no idea what’s going on so he just accepted it. Damien left huffing.

That was very weird but now he can go to the library in peace. The library only had a couple of students there. Oz was sitting at a table reading a book, Brian sat next to them. Noticing his presence, Oz turned to look at Brain.

_“That took a while. Did something happen?”_

“Yeah, something weird just happened.” Oz tilted. “Damien sort of apologized to me, I guess? Something about causing trouble and forcing himself? He was sort of grunting the words I couldn’t hear them clearly.”

 _“That is weird.”_ Oz pulled out their phone and started typing something. _“I guess even he has some decency to know when he’s done something wrong.”_ They said monotone.

It sounded odd. Just this morning, Oz was fuming and ranting about Damien, even their text suggested that they were still mad at him. Brian checked his phone, only realizing now what Oz wrote at the end of the message.

“Uuuh… did you do something to Damien?”

 _“Maaaaybe.”_ Oz said in a mischievous tone. _“It’s nothing you need to worry about, though.”_

Well… it’s not like he actually cares what happens to Damien and Oz looks like they’ve cheered up so he won’t ask anymore. The two spend a quiet time reading together.

**Author's Note:**

> I kind of rushed the ending if you couldn't tell but I really wanted to bring everything full circle... if you could even see the circle lol  
> If there's a demand, I have some ideas for an after story or Oz's POV. No promises though since this was supposed to be a one-shot and I have an ongoing Damien x Oz slice of life fic, check it out if you're interested.  
> I would like to mention that I was listening to Mu - After Pain on loop as I was writing the first half. This part of the song really hits for me:  
> But I guess some of it is my fault  
> Maybe it's okay as it is  
> I want to feel "alive"  
> Is it okay if I breathe?


End file.
